至于吗 / 至于…吗【zhìyú ma / zhìyú … ma】

至于吗 tells someone their reaction is out of proportion. It doesn't expect an answer; it means "there's no need for that". Said alone, it reacts to what the other person just did.

Naming the overreaction

To say what is too much, put 这么 or 那么 + the reaction between 至于 and 吗.

It is a rhetorical question between people who know each other. To a stranger or a boss it sounds rude; 没必要 or 不用这样 say the same thing more gently.

Answering it

The usual reply is 至于! ("yes, it is!") or 当然至于, defending the reaction. 不至于 on its own means "it won't come to that" and has its own point.

Not the 至于 that starts a sentence

至于 at the start of a clause, followed by a topic, means "as for". 至于吗 always comes at the end, after the thing being judged.

• × 至于吗，这么小的事 → 这么小的事，至于吗？