8.4 Giving and receiving

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Overview

These three verbs are used to talk about giving and receiving, but Japanese always cares about whose point of view the action is described from.

あげる — give (from me / my side → someone else)
くれる — give (from someone else → me / my side)
もらう — receive (I / my side receives)

あげる — giving to others

あげる is used when you or someone on your side gives something to another person. Someone on your side could be your family, your group, colleagues from your company, etc.

Structure:

Giver は／が + Receiver に + Object を + あげる

。

I gave a present to my friend.

。

My mother gave money to my younger brother.

くれる — someone gives to me

くれる is used when someone gives something to you or to someone close to you (your family, your group).

Structure:

Giver は／が + Me／my side に + Object を + くれる

。

My friend gave me a book.

。

The teacher explained it for me.

Even when に is omitted, the meaning still implies “to me”.

。

My father gave me a present.

This verb highlights that you benefited from the action.

もらう — receiving

もらう focuses on the receiver. It means “to receive” or “to get”.

Structure:

Receiver は／が + Giver に／から + Object を + もらう

。

I received a present from my friend.

。

He receives a salary from his company.

に is common for people
から is often used for organizations or sources

くれる vs. もらう

Situation: Tanaka gives me a book.

。

Tanaka gave me a book.

。

I received a book from Tanaka.

Both are correct, but:

くれる highlights Tanaka’s kindness toward me
もらう highlights me as the receiver

Giving and receiving actions

These verbs are also used with actions, not just objects.

～てあげる — doing something for someone
ともだち友達ににほんご日本語をおしえて教えてあげました。
I taught Japanese to my friend.
おとうと弟にしゅくだい宿題をてつだって手伝ってあげました。
I helped my younger brother with his homework.
ともだち友達にちけっとチケットをとって取ってあげます。
I will get a ticket for my friend.
はは母にめえるメールをおくって送ってあげました。
I sent an email for my mother.
がいこくじん外国人にみち道をおしえて教えてあげました。
I gave directions to a foreigner.
～てくれる — someone does something for me
ともだち友達がしゅくだい宿題をてつだって手伝ってくれました。
My friend helped me with my homework.
ともだち友達がえき駅までおくって送ってくれました。
My friend took me to the station.
せんせい先生がゆっくりせつめい説明してくれました。
The teacher explained it slowly for me.
あに兄がぱそこんパソコンをなおして直してくれました。
My older brother fixed my computer for me.
てんいん店員さんがしゃしんをとって写真を撮ってくれました。
The clerk took a picture for me.
～てもらう — receiving someone’s help
せんせい先生にせつめい説明してもらいました。
I had the teacher explain it to me.
ともだち友達ににほんご日本語をおしえて教えてもらいました。
I had my friend teach me Japanese.
せんせい先生にさくぶん作文をなおして直してもらいました。
I had the teacher correct my essay.
ちち父にくるま車でおくって送ってもらいました。
I got my father to drive me.
どうりょう同僚にしごと仕事をてつだって手伝ってもらいます。
I will have a coworker help me with my work.

Points to keep in mind

あげる — giving from my side to others
くれる — someone gives to me or my side
もらう — I receive something
These verbs are also used for actions, not just things

Dialogue

せんしゅう先週、ともだち友達のたんじょうび誕生日だったので、ぷれぜんとプレゼントをあげました。ともだち友達はとてもよろこんで喜んでくれました。ともだち友達もわたくし私にてづくり手作りのくっきいクッキーをくれました。ごご午後はともだち友達ににほんご日本語をおしえて教えてあげました。ともだち友達はわたくし私にえいご英語をおしえて教えてくれました。おたがいにお互いにたすけあえて助け合えて、たのしい楽しいじかん時間でした。かえりぎわ帰り際に、ともだち友達がえき駅までおくって送ってくれました。つぎ次のひ日、しょくば職場でじょうし上司にしごと仕事のすすめかた進め方をおしえて教えてもらいました。わからないことをていねい丁寧にせつめい説明してもらえたので、たすかりました助かりました。ゆうがた夕方、はは母からやさい野菜をたくさんもらいました。はは母はいつもかぞく家族のためにてりょうり手料理をつくって作ってくれます。わたくし私もできるだけはは母になんか何かしてあげたいといつもおもっています思っています。

Last week it was my friend's birthday, so I gave them a present. My friend was very happy. My friend also gave me some homemade cookies. In the afternoon I taught my friend Japanese. My friend taught me English. We were able to help each other and it was a pleasant time. When leaving, my friend took me to the station. The next day, at work, I had my supervisor teach me how to proceed with the work. Since they explained the things I didn't understand carefully, it was a great help. In the evening, I received a lot of vegetables from my mother. My mother always cooks home-made food for the family. I always think that I want to do something for my mother as much as I can too.

New words

8.3 Choosing vs becoming

8.5 Polite requests

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